When Darkness Sings the Dawn

One of the moments of solitude that I have been graced with since Shayla’s passing, is in the form of Sendall Gardens. This sprawling 3.67 acre park sings it own praises in the many assorted flowers, tapered shrubbery and a variety of exceptional trees.

I recall taking my daughter to this place of splendour and us strolling along, inhaling the backdrop of Hydrangeas, clematis and lilies. Scattered throughout the landscape were secluded areas where we had taken the weight off our feet.  We encircled ourselves in the beauty of nature and looked up at the sky with lavender hues, to imagine the nightscape… full of brilliant stars.

Involving Shayla in my one of my favourite places was another connection I relished with my daughter. I thoroughly enjoyed her face lighting up, when she discovered something.

Returning to Sendall Gardens after losing her felt awkward…at first, almost out of place. I was uneasy and not sure how I would find the same comfort as before. I took light steps all around the area, listening to my footsteps on the crackling branches; echo the loneliness I suffered inside. It took a great deal of focus to give attention to my vivid surroundings. I sat at a wooden ledge by the creek, letting the top branches shelter me from droplets. I took in air blended with composted leaves. My eyes gazed upon the lush greenery with moss clambering the roots of trees. I wondered what hidden treasures lay at the base where I was. What raw materials were concealed amongst the layers of the forest, possibly waiting to be unearthed?

I emerged from my own secret garden and fell in love again with the park of Sendall. This is such a place, where the loss of a loved one finds serenity. An environment that sees the rays of sunlight filtering through the branches, while water flows in a constant state of smooth moving torrents that beckon you to gather nearby.

Nestled amongst suburbia, (just off 50 Ave in Langley, BC) are the grounds of the Botanical gardens. A pleasant addition is a greenhouse, filled with an assortment of tropical plants and flowers. One of the unique planters is an elongated piece of bark, filled with moist soil and packed with an array of succulents. Amidst the foliage are bursts of colour from the fusion of birds of paradise and 13 other exotic plants grown inside the greenhouse. There is also a wonderful tribute to what I refer to as “Bob’s Bench.”  This autumn, I have taken several people from my Grief Group and we have shared tears, stories and countless memories of our loved ones who have passed away.

It is my belief that I was first drawn to this extraordinary location because of its beauty. Now, I simply go there to rejuvenate my weary soul and as my hand settles into a particular area, I have come to know that as grief transforms my life, it can never rearrange the love I have for my sweet angel, Shayla.

By TL Alton