Monday, April 14, 2014

The Tides of Chance






In our everyday interaction with each other, we rarely have a chance to glimpse into how our words impact the lives of another. We can use our language to bring joy, laughter and a sense of kinship when we share. The decision to open oneself up and reveal the sorrow- we guard close to our hearts- is something that can leave us exposed, especially if that trust is broken. I have lived through both sides of the spectrum… as much as the darkness tried to consume me; the filtered rays of light continue to pour into my delicate heart.  By allowing myself to stay true to my own principles, I am fulfilling my role as a bereaved mother, with the stories of my treasured daughter, Shayla. 

Last year, many unexpected opportunities came my way that saw me leave a life behind that was destined to crumble. In exchange, I was granted solitude that I had not seen in years. While house and pet sitting, I was offered employment at Silhouette Fashion Boutique, in Armstrong. At the time, I had no idea of the light that was surrounding me, guiding me along to where I am now the happiest I have been. Being back at work gave me a sense of value and enabled me to interact with the customer’s in a positive atmosphere. Every day, I looked forward with anticipation, for the chance to share my journey. There was something which uplifted me when helping customers; a sense of importance as I dressed them in the latest fashions. The energy that flowed in the boutique spread out past the displays I created. I took pride in offering a genuine connection to the woman that walked in. Never could I have imagined the ripple effect of my words months later-which have flowed back to me- in a tidal wave of compassion. 

One day, I had a lady enter the store who came to have a look around. She was not from Armstrong, but wanted to come see what Silhouette Fashion Boutique, had to offer. Her name was Margaret Pacheco. Conversing with her came easily, as we shared about life and children, soon the unfolding tale of my daughter had Margaret listening intently. It is interesting to note that I no longer always tell everyone about the tragic passing of Shayla or divulge the cause I created, The Heart Pebble Movement. Some past, unkind experiences have taught me that not everyone wants to know or has your best interest at heart. Now, I pay attention to whether there is a genuine opportunity to spread the ray of light that my daughter, remains. Margaret was such a person who was touched by what I was sharing. At one point, she left to go to her car. What she brought back was a remarkable fusion of Mother Nature’s beauty and the epitome of The Heart Pebble Movement. It was an extraordinary pink granite rock, shaped in the form of a heart. It was sparkly and had small black flecks inside its creation. Margaret went on to explain that she had transported the rock in her vehicle for months, unsure of its purpose or what to do with it. I sensed her excitement when she openly told me that she was going to be travelling to Jamaica and would find a special place to release it. I was humbled by her generous offer and gave her link to the movement. We parted ways and I thought about how the world was churning out such phenomenal opportunities… for the release of pebbles all over the earth! 

There is no method of reason for those I chose to speak with or give the link to the cause. I have lost count how many times I have poured my heart out to complete strangers, never fully aware of the impact Shayla’s legacy has on others. Sometimes, I purely enjoy the compassion of those who are kind enough to listen to a grieving mother. My life carries on, as I cherish the simplicity of the movement. I know that at any given instant, someone can reach back and remind me that there are angels in my world.

Many months passed since first meeting Margaret. I had wondered what come about of the jagged, pink rock that once was in my hands. Yet, I never dwell on it. Once I have told the story and relayed the beauty of The Heart Pebble Movement; I know it is the celestial awakening of destiny as to where it goes or if people decide to participate. 

Recently, I opened my email to discover the following words:

Hi, Tonya, Sorry it has taken me so long to get this to you. I have thought of you and your daughter lots. I’m the lady that came into a store were you were working in Armstrong BC. You and I got talking about life and kids and when I heard your daughters story, I went to my car and got this rock that I had been carrying in there for months. I told you we were heading to Jamaica and I would bring it and leave it in the Sea some where.  My boyfriend, sister and brother in-law were all with me. I told them the story and we all went together to the waters edge and thought about your daughter and how strong you are. Here are two pictures of the rock. Take care I will never forget you and your daughter. And know that I think you are the strongest and best mom I know. lots of hugs go out to you. Margaret Pacheco


I was ecstatic with the magnificent release, Margaret’s thoughtful gesture and the two images I received! She had found a way amongst six billion people, to transform our conversation into action. Margaret held close the knowledge that in her vehicle was something that had the power to bring about change. Then she made the choice to become a source of joy in my life, moving ripples outward into the world, through releasing her pink rock in my daughter’s memory. 


This release is a brilliant teacher. It offers the lesson that one positive act of kindness-stimulated by a chance encounter in a boutique- carries with it the momentum of a 21 yr old girl… who wanted to make a difference in the world, and has. 

By TL Alton