Bela Praia

“Perhaps travel cannot prevent bigotry, but by demonstrating that all peoples cry, laugh, eat, worry, and die, it can introduce the idea that if we try and understand each other, we may even become friends.” – Maya Angelou

Over the centuries, Portugal’s medley of land and culture has seen various civilizations introduced. In the area of Vila do Bispo, the existence of megalithic stones, confirm human presence in southern parts of Portugal. 

Within the country, elaborate designs of architecture are home to fifteen World Heritage Sites. Panels of tin- glazed tile work adorning the walls of Portugal are called Azulejo and can be seen in the exterior or the interior of schools, residences, churches and also railways. Often the azulejo record the history of Portugal`s cultural and past.  Derived from the Arabic word zellige which means ‘polished stone,’ azulejo replicate the Roman mosaic. 

Surrounded by Portugal’s cerulean waters- which emulate hand painted swirls of Porches pottery- are sea caves of the Algarve region.  

It was in the solitude plage of Praia de Benagil, a visual feast of creation, where my dear friend Dini, released a pebble for Shayla.  

As unique as Shayla was- this pebble released for her by Dini

There is irony in the revelation that Benagil cave is listed as the “50 Most Breathtaking Places to Visit Before You Die". Shayla’s care-free spirit has been released in pebbles all over the world- travels taken, after her passing.  

This sea cave is nature’s most iconic structure along the Algarve Coast of Portugal. Layered rock formations extend an invitation to venture into a sanctuary of stone arches. The cavern’s open skylights engage visitors to see the rays of sunshine that appears from the heavens.

Over the years, there have been pebble releases that are connected to the sacred
realm of this world. Locations that go beyond a simple pebble being dropped into a source of water; they intertwine with the purpose, in a magical way.

This is one of those occasions where the cause I created is eclipsed by the sheer discovery of such an exquisite place.

Dini, who took part in this marvellous release for The Heart Pebble Movement, has done so on numerous times, all over the world. Shayla knew Dini- who is from South Africa, as my TESL Instructor at Okanagan College. Over the twenty-one years my daughter and I had together, I shared with her many kinds of adventure. Dini saw firsthand how our relationship was forged in a strong bond.

My former teacher and I have kept in touch and at moments that mattered in my life, Dini has always been there. Her maternal instinct, having daughters of her own, has seen her stand by my side during the painful loss of my own babygirl. We have shared in tears at the Candlelight Vigil I held the first year of Shayla’s death. Last summer, Dini gathered with others by the Ponderosa pines, overlooking where my daughter swam in Okanagan Lake- to dedicate the Memorial bench in Shayla’s name.

This year, I saw her briefly as she showed me a slideshow of her time spent in Japan, where she helped to create TESL videos for students. Her abundance of energy, compassion for others and acceptance of who I am, is something I miss in the absence of my own mother. Dini has never spoken a harsh word in the many years we have been friends. She never criticizes my decisions; whether poor ones or brilliant-she is a rock in my life- a foundation of never ending support. 

Recently, my mentor shared with me her latest involvement. Dini is to have a role in Mothers Against Drunk Driving. She wants to be involved with public awareness; specifically the 911 campaign to report drunk drivers and impaired boaters.   

Yesterday, I received a message from Dini that she would be taking part in the Okanagan chapter of MADD vigil. This was the second annual event where candles were lit and a large stand displayed photographs of those who had died, related to drunk driving. More awareness is being brought to the matter of being impaired by drugs and choosing to drive. With the holiday season upon us, it is even more critical to remind others to make alternate plans, to ensure making it to destinations safely.

After the vigil, I heard from Dini who expressed how heart wrenching it was to attend. She lit a candle for Shayla and thought of her horrific car wreck four years ago, where speed and driver inexperience were partly to blame. Despite my daughter’s best efforts to correct her trajectory towards an embankment, she over-corrected her car sending it over a cliff side and her vehicle ended up crashing thru the ice.

I know all too well the sight of a Police Officer standing in front of you, to tell you your child has died.

Another quirk of fate is that when I use to get a MADD ribbon for my car or purse, my daughter liked to tie it on for me.

This year, I will lend my support for Mothers Against Drunk Driving, praying for the changes needed to bring senseless deaths, to an end.

In looking back, I can see how far Dini and I have come in our relationship. Far removed from the confines of a classroom, our roles as pupil and teacher have evolved. I am proud to have shared in years of friendship with Dini- who has been an advocate for many things. It is my hope through my own struggles and adversities; she has seen me grow in wisdom and confidence.

Before I finished writing this post, Dini sent me a marvellous remark about my ‘gift for gab.’

Through my own brokenness, she sees potential. In my challenges, she observes my courage and in times of sorrow, she is witness to my faith.

This educator of many has left her own pebbles behind in the legacy of her teachings. Dini made wanting to learn, an experience worthy of remembering. 

As a mother, she understands the significant meaning of this cause. Her releases-have allowed my grief to be replaced with the emotionally stunning journey of pebbles-now covering this earth. 

I pay tribute to my South African teacher with these parting words which are for you Dini ~ 
Jy is baie dierbarr!

By TL Alton