Through the Eyes of a Child

The soul is healed by being with children. ~ Fyodor Dostoevsky 

Parker

As time passes by, I often think what it would be like to have become a grandmother. The joy of being able to hold a grandchild in my arms and see the legacy of mine and Shayla’s lives carry on, is something I have always yearned for. When my daughter passed away, I never believed I would experience the happiness of having another child in my life. Then a blue-eyed little girl, with freckles sprinkled across her cheeks and boundless strawberry curls, entered into my world. Her name is Parker and she has enabled me to seek the courage to love a child again. 

In the summertime, Parker and her Grandpa Dave (Shayla’s father) came for a visit. I decided to take them to places Shayla and I had spent time together, over the years). Our first stop was to Crescent Beach, near White Rock, BC, where they sat near the ocean and blew bubbles.  

Grandpa Dave and Parker- Crescent Beach

Later, I took them to see the snowberry bushes planted in memory of three loved ones lost in the year 2011-Shayla, Marilyn and Chad. The lush green foliage was bursting with pinkish flowers and white berries. The name of the genus is derived from the Greek words, meaning "to bear together." 

Snowberry Bush

Our next visit was to Redwood Park, in Langley, BC where I hoped to share “The Fairy Forest” with Parker. Unfortunately due to my directionally challenged nature, I went left instead of right and we ended up taking a long walk through the woods. Dragging a massive leaf, this little 4 ½ year old was about to give up on finding anything exciting to do, when we spotted the playground that sufficed her quest for adventure. 

 

Tonya and Parker at The "Upside Down Tree"

Over the past few weeks, I have been working on a special project for Kimberly’s daughter, Parker. It is my hopes that when she finally receives her gift, it will make up for me getting us ‘lost’ in the woods.

Family Memories

It has brought me such grace to know that I can have a relationship with her, in whatever form and that she has a vast imagination, much like her Aunty Shayla did. 

When Parker and her brother Mason were born, my daughter made sure she was a part of their lives. Many pictures were taken of Shayla with her niece and nephew...it is bittersweet to reflect back on the snapshots and imagine what an extraordinary mother she herself would have become. 

I never thought it would be possible to be around little babies or children again, yet I knew that if I did not participate in their lives, mine would be left emptier than it already is. To be able to share the love that Shayla would have imparted on them is to summon from my own grief, some form of healing. 

As I take a step outside my comfort zone, I chose to make new memories and be grateful for believing that love comes in all forms; in all possibilities…despite a world of loss. 

By T.L. Alton