On the Third Day of Christmas ~ Nostalgia

 Nostalgia definition, a wistful desire to return in thought or in fact to a former time in one's life, to one's home or homeland, or to one's family and friends ...

My connection with trees and the association of sacred memories I have with them, goes back to my time spent in the forest as a young girl. I found solace trudging through masses of woodlands where for a part of my life, I grew up. In amongst a cache of birch trees, I whispered my darkest secrets to the sprawling timberland and in return they offered me a secure place to hide. 

Later in my writing career, my first novel that I have devoted a great amount of time to features the prominent formation of a magical Sitka spruce. Years earlier, I was told that this is my “Spirit Tree.”

When I attended the Memorial bench dedication to my daughter, I sat in the early dawn amongst the towering pine trees that are on either side. Pines are the symbol of remembrance and protection.  It also is Shayla’s “Spirit Tree.” 

When stepping back into the holiday season, I found myself purchasing two Christmas trees. I could not accept to have lives ones, so mine are the non-watering kind. I bought a mini tree for the sole purpose of displaying the hand-painted and crafted ornaments that my babygirl had made, while growing up. There is a little clothes pin soldier, two metallic dipped eggs to honour the Ukrainian heritage, a Popsicle moose and endless angels. When she was older, she made a sign language adornment. One of my personal favourites is a piece of wood she carved and painted, then added the word “Mom.” 

The other tree stands just 4ft, but is embellished with many sentimental décor that we bought throughout the years. To honour Shayla’s passion for dance, I gave her a mother and daughter twirling together. As a collector of numerous sock monkey’s I have two of them, a girl and a boy, hanging off my tree.

 

I have a special key from 2010, a beautifully hand-crafted native art bulb, along with an exceptional Mickey and Minnie Disney ornament. It was bought for my daughter in 2011 but she never had a chance to receive it.

This year, I purchased a Betty Boop angel as Shayla was an avid collector. 

 I added a daughter heart...

 ...a feather decoration for her Aboriginal roots and a snowflake. Draping the tree is a special hand-made ornament with proceeds going to African AIDS Angels. I took my time in picking out the one I felt was special for my tree. It had been given a traditional African name in honour of a child who has been affected by AIDS. Her name is GZIFA (One is at peace). 

On a branch is a glittery white dove, from my friends, TJ and Dean who I house and pet sat for last winter. The prominent figurines of angels echo the love for my child. On a lower bough is a glass angel that pulsates with a kaleidoscope of colours, when the switch is on. I brought her back from a lovely quaint shop in London and was elated to see it arrived safely in one piece. My Hawaiian Anela I purchased along the road to Hana. In amongst the brimming boughs is a white cross I decorated for this year. It reads, “Remember when…”  This symbolizes all of the years I was blessed with creating extraordinary holiday memories together. 

Since I am unable to wrap my arms around my babygirl- the poignant adornments reflect the nostalgia of Christmas’s past- and consist of the spirit of reminiscing. Every time I sit in the solitude of my cozy home and gaze upon the twinkles casting a glow over my trees; there is significance of the memories they display.   

By T.L. Alton