Pebble Seeds of Hope and Remembrance

"Travel is more than the seeing of sights; it is a change that goes on, deep and permanent, in the ideas of living." -- Miriam Beard

I recently met up with my friend Katherine, for a lunch date and plans to go see Redwood Park in Surrey, BC. We had made plans to go to The Fairy Forest that is nestled deep into the wooded areas of the sprawling forest. 

Katherine and I have been friends for over a year- we met through The Langley Hospice Society- in a Bereavement group. Her sorrow was full of heart-wrenching angst in losing her one true love, her husband Glen. 

Overtime, we connected and months later, we have shared in many special places that sees Glen and Shayla shine their love and light upon us. We envision the quintessence of who they were to us, in the bursts of sunflowers that stretch towards the sky. Our hearts skip a beat when we discover a mailbox- reminisce of The Lake House, actually has touching messages from people all over the world. In the same way, we marvel at a pebbles release in locations that have extraordinary connections to Shayla.

The last time I saw Katherine, she gave me a USB stick, full of pictures, videos and showing her part in The Heart Pebble Movement. In sharing her travels, my friend has also opened herself to the cause that plants pebble-seeds of HOPE and REMEMBRANCE on this earth. 

From the pounding surf of Morro Strand State Beach in California, to the dancing kaleidoscope lights of the Bellagio Resort, Katherine’s release of pebbles for Shayla-each time-is a hug around my grieving soul. 

In May of this year, adventure was shared between Katherine and her daughter, Jasmine. The duo travelled to the Yukon, to see Katherine’s best friend, Amy. Over the time I have known Katherine, she has expressed the friendship and strong bond she has with Amy. Over the course of our grief journeys, we have shared the people who have been there for us as we struggled with the loss of our loved ones. My friend made it known that Amy has always been her rock as Katherine mourns Glen. 

Yukon

While in the Yukon- Katherine went to a special place and set one of my daughter’s rocks I had given her- on a section of bridge, overlooking the surging river below. Carved, long ago, was her name- a poignant reminder of a memory that had passed, yet forever remains embedded in the white painted wood. The placement of one of Shayla’s pebble was then given to the churning waters. With its release, came a sense of embracing the beautiful care-free spirit she was. 

Her travels, along with Jasmine, took them back to California and this time the freedom of another pebble from Shayla’s collection, was let go at Pismo Beach. The area of glistening sand colliding with the ocean water brought me solace in knowing the pebble had found a new home. 

One of the things I treasure is that both a mother and daughter had taken part in the cause; a gift in itself, as I no longer have my babygirl to cuddle, love and tell her how precious she is to me. Yet the memories we shared still remain everlastingly… imprinted on my broken heart.

In getting to know Katherine, I have valued her friendship and have been grateful for all she has done to honour my daughter. Every photograph she has taken or video she has shared tells a story. One in which connects her and I both in our tragic losses, but also in the love we continue to have for those we dearly miss.  

By T.L. Alton

The Beauty of Release

California has a beautiful coastline. It can be a rough coastline. The waves are huge. The rocks are steep. … It's dramatic. - Jennifer Granholm

There is in the depths of grief that serves a purpose; a freeing of emotions that is my desire to release. I have found its rationale in the form of The Heart Pebble Movement and the branches of friendship; measured in the tears shared amongst those who have remained True friends. Grief has enabled me to discover the simple flow of its presence; connecting me to places, people and things. An unlikely teacher, the mourning process cores through my veins; at times it makes me catch my breath, other moments bringing me to my knees.  This painful journey, as isolated I may feel sometimes, has not been a solo passage. I now am coupled with my heartache to others suffering the loss of a loved one.

 It was in my Grief Group, offered through The Langley Hospice Society, that I first met Katherine. Her personal route along the throes of sadness brought us together. She was mourning her husband and I was in bereavement over my daughter. Our guards were up in a room full of strangers and I recall saying to the group of people. “I do not want to be here.” Looking back, it was a daft thing to remark as it was obvious no one else wanted to be a part of a Grief Group either. Due to the sensitive information that is shared amongst those participating in the 10 week course and respect for those grieving, I am only sharing where we met. I know that through us connecting over our anguish, Katherine and I have become friends.

 As we weave the tapestry of loss, trying to make sense of the compartment of our hearts that once held shelter; we have revealed our wounds to each other. I have felt her tears on my shoulder, held her trembling hand and sat at Sendall Gardens, under a canopy of darkness as we spilled our pain into the dusk.  Through it all, my discoveries about Katherine have revealed a woman whose spirit is unwavering in her quest to eventually move to California. The peace that is written all over her is invoked by the pristine coastline that stretches for miles. I know her voyage is to continue and bring her to the USA, as the seasons have come and gone, she has not wavered in her desire to settle there.

During the past months, Katherine has travelled where the seaside thrives, from mountain lakes and streams, to the endless Pacific coastline; this is where she feels at home. With the California sun, her tears seem to be soothed, while her weary soul is restored with the pounding surf. It is here, she tends to the scars left behind from the loss of a man whose love for her was undeniable.

 On her last trip, Katherine had picked a special pebble from Shayla’s collection to place in California and honour my daughter through The Heart Pebble Movement.  I knew the journey the pebble would take would be one of discovery for Katherine too.

Recently, I met with my dear friend and she handed me an envelope. Her warm smile expressed a sense of contentment. She explained how she had gone to Morro Strand State Beach, a coastline where the grains of sand are smoothed by the winds. Katherine shared the release of the pebble and how it reminded her of a heart. Her thoughtfulness was spoken in her genuine feelings of what it meant to partake in the cause. It did not matter how broken she felt inside, for Katherine was embracing what many others have. In doing so, she let the subtle layers of the movement take hold; sharing in the inspiration.

Once back home, I opened the envelope to find a dozen snapshots of her visit to Morro Strand State Beach. Each picture had words of description on the back. There was a handwritten note sharing how she had delivered Shayla’s pebble to the Pacific Ocean at her ‘most favorite beach.’  It was dated September 8, 2012. Included was a USB stick that had additional video footage of the release, along with the photos as a slideshow. As I looked at everything, the video moved me deeply as I had a visual displaying the beauty of her actions. With Katherine’s permission I am sharing her beautiful photographs and video with the world.

 It is amazing how the simplicity of such a cause has seen people reach out in the form of a pebble, reminding me the essence of which Shayla was… will always remain.

http://youtu.be/IR0aVtIqZD4

By TL. Alton

Journey -Lights (When the Lights Go Down in the City)

http://youtu.be/I6jvJs5jkwI