No Comfort in the Shadows

People are like stained - glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in; their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light from within. -Elisabeth Kubler-Ross

A journey of any kind will entail the fusion of darkness and light. It is the will to endure and thrive that sees our paths cross with those whose sole purpose is to try and stretch out the illumination. Thus, their hopes of crushing the free –will of others, is determined in a multitude of reactions. 

We all know the expression turn the other cheek and yet in times of crisis when we ourselves feel we are threatened it spins into: “An eye for an eye.” We are taught to walk a mile in someone else’s shoes and yet we find ourselves unmovable and numb, when stricken with the wrath of those, whose motives cannot be understood. 

As a survivor of many things, I thought I had suffered greatly and could not possibly be made to go through anymore thrashing of my soul. That was until the snowflakes fell upon my daughter’s vehicle, under layers of ice- my world came smashing down upon me.

Even now, going on to the two year mark of her passing, the constant reminder of her death can be seen in my face. In every wrinkle, is etched the 45 minutes of her darkness in McKinley Reservoir. Shayla’s hopes were taken; my daughter’s future seized on December 12, 2011. 

Losing my only child was a misery like no other and I never imagined how my life would ever carry on. Slowly, I began what I hoped to be a grief journey that would see fragments of light and grace brought back into my world. Yet in the time since has Shayla passed, I have had my mourning path implode with the interaction of some of those I can only deem as malevolent. Every time I took out my heart from safe-keeping, it was knocked around by a few people who did not believe in happy endings.  

Yet, each stumble upon the way… has seen me rise above all of the anguish with a resounding desire to seek a new beginning. 

I have shared how my writing has grounded me and that my faith sees me believe that heaven is a place where some of us take the long road home, to get there. 

As a writer, I have penned the tales of a variety of characters. Ask any successful author and they will share -to every outlandish person they may encounter- is gratification in knowing they may end up as a character in one of their stories. 

So, to those whose stain glass pieces reflect their inner beauty, you don’t need me to remind you we are merely passing through. However- to those who think they can knock down a grieving mother- if you come to my playground of lightness… your merry go round of darkness is simply not welcome.

By T.L. Alton

* Photo- Tim Spivey