A Symmetrical Season

In composing my first blog of 2015, I need to express my gratitude to those who brought me the essentials of Christmas- Peace, Hope and Love. This holiday season, was unequal to any of those I pushed through, since the loss of my daughter. Even though it was my second year of being alone during the festivities- I felt the compassion of many- who reminded me the real gifts of the heart comes in many forms. 

Right before Christmas, I underwent Surgery that had difficulties afterwards in recovery. Once at home, the steady stream of people who brought me the comforts of homemade food, presents, cards and most valuable- their time, is something I cherished! Having an operation is daunting enough, let alone returning to an empty place. Yet, I was blessed with certain individuals who dropped in for a visit to offer me their support. I would like to express my deepest gratitude to Sheril, Elaine, Kelly and Yvonne for being there for me when I was enduring such pain. These women were the most devoted care givers and each of them saw me through challenging times. 

I was also gratified with an array of food that packed my cupboards and fridge. The meals dropped off were greatly appreciated; especially at a time when I could not cook for myself.  My thankfulness is extended to Penny and Brent, Yvonne and Henry, Sheril and Jay, Ron and Gail, Ashley and April, David and Audrey, Elaine and Stef for nourishing me and uplifting my spirit!

An unexpected blessing came in the form of presents given to me stemming from the love and kindness of others. One friend gave a book, another lady provided me with a Christmas flower. I received a beautiful Angel figurine from Yvonne and Henry. 

A lovely ‘rainbow’ handmade scarf, the Cloninger family created together.

I formed the scarf into a Heart, before I wore it

Kelly and Dave’s young son Zachary, gave me a beautiful arrangement he had won at his Awana Club.   

Two brilliant creations of trees came from Sarah Kube and will remain on display throughout the years to come. 

The generosity was in abundance when I received a gift from my kind-hearted landlords! 

An envelope came in the mail from my high school friend Michelle Wells. It contained a touching Christmas card with a $50 Visa that has seen me buy a stunning Butterfly ring. 

I was thrilled to receive from my friend Sheril, a bath/shower set, now that I am feeling much better; it is wonderful to have my own ‘independence’ again in taking care of myself.

With every gift, I was reminded to convey my Thanks for every moment present!

 My home, once empty of the Christmas spirit, saw every corner of it brimming with such thoughtfulness. Cards filled with sentiment, prayers and well-wishes line my cupboards; reminders of God’s love bestowed upon me through others. The steady stream of phone calls full of Season Greetings were conversations that encouraged me to get well soon; people reaching out in friendship and fellowship.

One thing I have had much of, while healing, is time…opportunities to look back and reflect on where I am at, one year later. I have endured turbulent upheavals where mourning seemed to reign over me… while on many occasions, my face towards the sun…the brokenness was penetrated by the radiance of my Faith.

 I have been heavy laden- anchored beneath to the ocean floor, after my ship capsized. I watched unfold before me the delicate wisps of Forgiveness in the petals of an Gerbera Daisy…Shayla’s  personal favourite flower. This uncertain pathway has made me realize that my absolution needs to be directed inward-that having to let go is the toughest work I will encounter! To unwrap myself from the ghost of a lost loved one requires bravery. Yet it allows me to become who the Lord intended-free of the painful burdens placed upon me by a man, who shattered all my trust. 

I understand the importance of Forgiving when hurt by others, but never Forgetting the life lessons it taught you.

In taking a stand, I am also taking care of my heart. Seeing how courageous I have been through all of the hurt, brings a great sense of pride, in how far I have come. Leaving behind what appeared  to be a fantasy realm of its own, I hold near to me the changes encountered. 

Putting on my Armor of God has seen me charge into battles and emerge... singing the praises of Hallelujah! I am ready to seek the purity of love again while embracing my new beginnings.
 

Never could I have imagined the beauty coming back in my world; a painter’s light on a canvas unveiling to me that “It Is getting Better!” 

Happy New Year!

  

By T.L. Alton